~ Words written on a torn page~
——-
Silently she knelt to the floor, her legs spread, her eyes closed, hands drawn out over her thighs to lay in waiting. She listened to everything around her, the sound of the breeze as it brushed through the trees, the cry of the cats as they roamed just outside of her bedroom window. She could hear the sound of distance cars driving along the highway, and the occasional sounds of the trains whistles as they came by. The world continued to go on around her, as she knelt there in waiting.
The beating of her own heart which sounded like a thousand drums banging away within her ears in anticipation. She whimpered as pain rushed up over her back from the welts left upon her skin. It was all she could focus on, the pain, and the maddening sounds which surrounded her in a whirlwind of chaos. “When will he come?” she said to herself, thinking of the next encounter with the man in the black mask.
She blinked her eyes and looked down upon the pillow where the velvet blindfold was left for her. She know his wishes but she fought it with every ounce of her being. She did not want to take away from herself the very layer for which she clung to, the very thing which she refused to give to him. She clung to it with all her strength, like it was the very thing keeping her alive.
“Why does he want this of me?” she said to herself deep within her mind
“Why will he not just listen, why is he being so stubborn and just give in!”
She rose to stand and began to pace along the floor back and forth in frustration, in anxiety. Suddenly, she remembered his words when He parted
“you are not to move till you choose to put in the blindfold!”
Quickly she dropped to her knees once more and crawled her way before the pillow. She threw her hands in frustration and anxiety, pushing the pillow away from her which held the forsaken blindfold. She wanted to rip his eyes out and pound on his chest, she was so mad at him, but she remembered the words “I will not come till your ready and have shown me by placing the blindfold on.”
“I can’t do this” she repeated to herself in soft whispers which were barely audible, and certainly to no one but herself. She closed her eyes and pictured him standing there looking down over her. She could see the look in his eyes, the gaze of his face, his lips, everything about him. She turned her head slowly even with her eyes shut tight and turned to look at the faces of the other Men, heir gaze focused on her when she was struck with the first lash before them. She remembered the pain, the suffering and why she did it, for them, not herself.
Time had past, minutes which felt like hours. She knelt there obediently upon the ground, feeling the tension in her legs, the pull of muscles, the bruising which rose along her knees as they were pressed in the hard wooden floor. Anger turned to sadness now as tears began to flow down her cheeks. She could feel the first droplet which formed from her left eye and slowly glided downwards across her cheep to fall to her arm stretched out on her left thigh. There were more, as one after the other flowed as sadness took its hold on her. “Why is he punishing me! Why! Why! What does He want from me!”, she called out in her mind in silence, as she struggled with the emotions which rippled through her. She knelt there and cried for what seemed like hours at a time. She felt abandoned, she felt like she was thrown away by herself, never to be seen again. All she could think about is the faces of those she would not see, the smiles and laughter of those seated about the table in the cafe, sipping their coffee and laughing around. These thoughts drew her even deeper and deeper into sadness as she struggled to refrain and contain herself, and struggled to control the emotions which ripped through her light blasts of lightning ripping through the sky. The tears wouldn’t stop, they wouldn’t go away, they wouldn’t cease, only till her eyes were rippled with pain and dried to the point there was no tears.
She lowered her head down and took in a deep breath and sighed. She remembered his words when she fell to her knees before him for the first time..
“You are here to serve the community, not yourself. You receive just as much as you give. ”
Her hands shook as she moved them forward, fear ripping through every bit of her core. She reached to take hold of the blindfold which she was so frightened about and scared about and slowly lifted it upwards to slide over her eyes, fixing it so that it covered them completely……..
…………………
Moments past as she was now rendered in darkness, but no longer was she in control it. She snapped her eyes open only to be met with more darkness as the light of the room was completely taken from her. She was scared and frightened, every sound which was around her was heightened ten fold. She kept snapping her eyes open and shut hoping to get a glimpse of light. Her hands fidgeted upon her thighs, scraping back and forth as a soft whimper escaped her lips. She waited anxiously, listening, wanting, waiting, time simply passing around her.. There she was, naked in her beauty, posed so submissively upon the carpet. She drew herself downwards, pressing her cheep to the floor before her, as her hands drew to push away the pillow. She shifted her back so her soft crimson tresses flowed away from her back, the marks rippled across her backside and buttocks seemed to glow with pain as it was the only thing she could focus on. She took in a deep sigh and simply fell still in her silence and waited… She had given in, had submitted to that of his desires, even as much as she wished to fight it. She had succumbed to his wills, his wants and his expectations…
Suddenly, she could hear the footsteps out in the hallway. It crept closer and closer. till it stopped just at the doorway of the small bedroom. The doorknob began to turn and there his boots presented themselves before her. He reached down with his strong hand to brush along her face and gently drew her upwards, helping her to her feet. He slowly wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him, laying her head against his shoulder and whispered “You have learned to give in my submission, you have learned to let yourself go and surcumb to my wishes, my darkness… Now it is that your new found journey shall begin.. ”
He then lead her by the hand, his strong grasp drawn to her own as He walked with her heading down the hallway through the double arches and then through the double doors which were opened and closed to engulf them as they disappeared from sight within the darkened chambers beyond….