The first thing when understanding what a power exchange is, is to pay close attention to the second word, exchange. Power exchanges are NOT one sided. They are something for which is shared between two people. What is taken has to be given back and what is given has to be received back. This is done within the dynamic of a lifestyle relationship. A dominant may take pleasure from a submissive, but in return he gives back so much more to her, trust, nurturing, caring and the responsibilities of being a Dominant to him or her.
Power Exchange
A power exchange is usually found within a Dominant/submissive relationship. It is a relationship which is accompanied by a contract for which is negotiated between the parties involved. This is always figured out before a collar is ever placed on the submissive’s throat. The contract is something for which lays out what both the submissive and what the dominant are looking for in the relationship. It lays out the needs, wants, what is provided, and what is expected and understood within the relationship. Things such as rules, visions for the future, rules and regulations for personal growth, what the Dominant will not accept are all things that if not laid out in a contract, should both be mutually agreed upon by both parties.
In a PE relationship it was best described to me as that the Dominant may ask the submissive to jump and the submissive might ask how high.
Total Power Exchange
Total Power exchanges are usually found in a Master-Mistress/slave dynamic. It is understood that within this relationship structure that if a Dominant places a collar on a submissive’s neck that submissive is a slave and the Master is in complete control of that slave. In this dynamic the Dominant assumes total responsibility for the slave and the slave relinquishes all control and yields to that authority of that Dominant. It is the giving of total control to that person. There is usually a very larger form of psychological control for which is put in place then a common power exchange relationship or dynamic.
One biggest misconception about TPE relationships is that there is always micromanagement of the slave. This means every moment the slave wakes up to the time the slave goes to sleep is managed completely. The misconception is that this is not entirely true. I have seen a lot of people involved in a TPE relationship where the slave does in fact have some choices to make throughout their day. They go to work, they hold a profession and they tend to duties and things about the house without having every waking moment managed in one form or another.
Some would say that in a TPE relationship that the slave holds no limits and the Master or Mistress can do whatever they wish to them. I do not believe this to be true. Even in a TPE relationship, there is going to still be limits and these should certainly be agreed upon during the development of the relationship. Contracts can be used at times even in a TPE relationship, they just usually take on a different form or writing style.